Sleep Training? Day One

Date: August 11, 2009 11:16:05 PM

Sleep training: Day 1

Today I set up the pack and play in the corner of my room. Owen took a three hour afternoon nap and then slept from five to eleven. So if sleep begets sleep, I might just sleep tonight!

Brad fed him a bottle at eleven, then I changed him. We lay on the bed together with the blue light on. The first time he yawned I put him in the p and p. Then when I heard him yawn again I turned off the lights.

He has been huffing and several times I’ve thought he was going to cry but he is quiet right now. I've heard him yawn a few times. Tonight is also the first time he is sleeping without his swaddle. He has really been fighting it recently. But he punches himself in the face without it .

Still quiet! Am I going to sleep more than three hours in a row? I won't get my hopes up. My mom said I slept through the night at six weeks. I would also put myself to bed. He made a little noise but he had been silent for a minute before that.

Another yawn followed by huffing. A soft coo. A yawn without huffing. Several louder coos, like he's saying, Anyone there?Huffing.

It has only been three minutes? WTF

Grunting, quiet, snort, coo, annoyed coo. More yawns. No huffing!! Sounds like he is eating his hands. This is hard. I'm going to listen to my iPod.

Didn't listen to iPod. It has been eight minutes, no crying. Things are looking good. Nine. Yawn. Coo. No huffing. Deep relaxed breath! Soft coo that trails off at the end. Ten minutes. No sound. Big snort. Smaller snort, movement. Loud coo. No huffing. Yawn. A protest fuss. Small coo.

Thirteen minutes. He must just be winding down. Quiet for minute. Faint snort. A few coos and huffs. I am going to send him relaxing energy. He responds with a loud protest cough. He's getting more worked up. He just said “hi”, with a southern accent.

Eighteen minutes. Quiet with moments of soft protest. Big yawn. Protests. Quiet.

Twenty minutes. He's getting worked up. Calling out ayeeee. Pre cry cough. Frustration. Cough. Ayeeee. Ayeeeeeeeeeee. Maybe he needs the swaddle.

If he starts crying I am going to wait five minutes before going to him. Frustration, quiet, frustration, coo. Big cough. This is serious.

It has been twenty five minutes. Crying has begun. Full cry. Sniff cry. Three more minutes. Hope Brad has ear plugs. First time I haven't immediately responded since he was born.

Louder. Sniffles. Two more minutes. Building steam. He is getting mad. One more minute. “Why have you forsaken me” type cry. I can visualize his lip quivering.

Losing steam? Two more minutes? Killing me not so softly. It sounds like whyyyyy? This is Torture. But not sleeping is also torture and I have had three months of that.

Quiet. Huffing. Weak cry. Quiet. Ten minutes. Crying, full. He was faking going to sleep, just resting. Getting more energy. Ok. Two more minutes. Weaker, trailing off. Quiet.

I could take down a ninja right now. My sympathetic fight or flight response is in high gear. Sniffles. Quiet. Seriously quiet.

Thirteen minutes since he started crying and now quiet. No huffing. No coughing. Is he suffocating on his snonkey? I will never be able to sleep. My heart is pounding. Still quiet. I don't want to wake him with the sound of me throwing up in my mouth.

Minutes of quiet and now full on, pissed off cry. I am going to soothe him.

End of Day 1: I picked him up. I tried to rock him to sleep. Finally I swaddled him with one arm out. Then I nursed him until he was sound asleep. I put him in the pack and play. So tired. Going to sleep at one.

Labor Pains

Owen Wylie was born on Thursday, April 30th, 2009 at 8:26 a.m. It was supposed to be my last day of school and I was planning on taking a final.

The night before he was born I was having regular Braxton Hicks contractions. Brad and I went on a long walk and the moment we walked in the door of our home, they completely stopped. I was hoping that we would be going to the hospital so that I wouldn't have to study for my final. But after all that walking I was too tired to study so I went to sleep at 11 p.m.

I woke up at 6 a.m. with mild cramps. Brad and I made a plan: we would get dressed, have breakfast and take Honey for a walk to get the contractions coming at a regular pace. We got out of bed at 7 a.m. and within 10 minutes I was having painful contractions 5 minutes apart. We modified the plan: Brad would take Honey for a quick walk while I finished packing. While he was walking with Hun, the contractions starting coming every 3 minutes and they were so painful I couldn't stand up. As I was calling his phone to tell him "We have to go NOW!!!", he walked in the door.

We loaded the car and left for the hospital at 7:45 a.m. Brad didn't have the doctor's phone numnber programmed into his phone, so I was reading it off to him. He looked up and saw that the cars ahead of us were stopped at a light. He slammed on the brakes and swerved into the oncoming lane. Thankfully no one was coming! We called my mom to tell her we were on the way to the hospital.

Brad pulled up to the hospital at 8 a.m. and grabbed a wheel chair. As we entered the hospital I was having a contraction and was moaning loudly. People were jumping out of the way. We got into the elevator and I started having another contraction. There was another man in the elevator who asked Brad if we were having a baby (duh!). I can forgive him though because his wife had a baby the day before and I am sure he was exhausted.

As we pulled up to the desk, I handed them the pre-registration papers that I was supposed to send in months before. They wheeled me into a room. I promptly took off all of my clothes (I was burning up) and laid on the bed. My first question was "Is the anesthesiologist at the hospital?" The nurse said that he was with my doctor in a C-section at the moment and that I couldn't get an epidural until they had started an IV. So I told her to please start an IV.

While Brad went to get me a glass of water, the nurse checked my "progress" and found I was at 8 centimeters, too late for any drugs. THis was not our birth plan. In all of the baby classes we had taken, I was often the only woman in the room who readily admited I was not going to have a natural birth and that I would get an epidural during the class if they would let me. Boulder is very supportive of women giving birth without any drugs. I was very comfortable with my decision to get drugged up and watch TV all day until Owen arrived in the afternoon. But now I was going to be an "earth mother."

With the epidural option not viable, my back up method for pain relief was screaming and squeezing (clawing) Brad's arm. I was scared. The nurse went to get the doctor out of surgery (luckily there was another doctor who could take over). Just as the doctor walked into the room, my water broke with a huge gush. I told her I had to push. She sat down, pulled on gloves and her mask and told me to push.

I pushed once . . . twice, and the doctor said one more push and he would be here. I gave it my all and Owen Wylie Sykes was born at 8:26 a.m. I was only in active labor for an hour and a half. He was born so fast that I didn't have an IV and I wasn't even in the computer system! They put him on my chest and toweled him off. Our precious son had arrived.

Brad called my mom at 8:30 to tell her she was a grandmother. Kai didn't understand. She hadn't even had her coffee since Brad had called! She was planning on having a leisurly day and coming to the hospital in the afternoon. But she told us she would throw some clothes on and come see her grandbaby!

Owen weighed 7 lbs 3 oz and was 21 inches long. He was born two weeks before his due date. We went home on Sunday, I wrote a final paper on Monday and took an essay final on Thursday (Owen turned one week old while I was furiously scribbling). Owen and I graduated on Friday and then I celebrated my first Mother's Day on Sunday.

It was absolutely insane and I couldn't have been happier!

Introducing . . . Owen Wylie Sykes

What a whirlwind!!! I am sitting here, in the hospital, with my brand new baby boy.

Owen's Growin'

It is the last week of school and it all feels very surreal. I was feeling stressed out but then my physiology teacher said I didn't have to take the final. This saved me 20+ hours of studying. There is a special place in heaven for Professor Whitford. I have one more class tomorrow, followed by my only test final. I still have one more paper to write, due next Monday. I should be studying right now, but I psyched myself out.

I went to my final writing class this evening and the class had a mini surprise baby shower for me. Everyone brought food and a few girls brought presents. I am glad that I decided to go to class and I didn't wear sweat pants! I was having regular, painless contractions throughout class. When I got home Brad and I went for a walk and I was having stronger contractions within 5 minutes of each other. But when we got home, they completely stopped. Bummer.

I went to see the doctor this morning. She said that Owen was probably around seven pounds. She also said that he should be here within a few days. I try to tell myself that "a few days" could easily become "a few weeks." A perfect example would be my friend, Melissa. She had her daughter on Monday, one week over due. I still have two weeks until my due date. I am in total limbo.

April Shower

My shower was on April 18th, a snowy Saturday. Anya was incredibly gracious to host it at her awesome home. She took care of all the details. I didn't have to worry about a thing, except not spilling anything on my stomach before I arrived. I was a little nervous to be the center of attention. All the hormones have made my behavior somewhat unpredictable. Brad continually reminded me that I would be surrounded by people that loved me and I could do no wrong. More than making a fool of myself, I have a fear of opening presents in front of people, even on a one to one basis. If you had told me last week that Baby Showers were about more than presents, I would probably have replied, "Yes. Presents and free food!" But after experiencing one for myself, I can truly say that a Baby Shower is about way more than gifts and grub.

The last nine months have been difficult. I was sick for the first five months, which made going to school even more challenging. Since the new year I have been adjusting to living with another person and blending our lives together in a peaceful and productive manner. Needless to say I have been practicing cooperation and communication. But over the last month I have finally felt a sense of stability in the present coupled with anticipation for the future. Brad and I have made our house a home. We have set up a nursery, with a crib and a glider. I was feeling like all we needed was the baby.

I had no idea how unprepared we were. People have been having babies for a very long time, despite not having diaper genies or breast pumps. Love, shelter and sustenance will go a very long way towards meeting a baby's needs, but don't underestimate the incredible inventions that help meet a new Mommy's needs.

There were so many presents that before I had opened half of them I was sweating. We got the rest of the necessities, like a stroller and car seat (so we don't have to live at the hospital). We got things that I wasn't sure I needed but that had come highly recommended, like the diaper genie and wipe warmer. Best of all we got a ton of stuff that were simply wants, like the softest baby blanket ever and a towel with a froggie hood. I will definitely have to start dressing better, lest my son be more fashionable with all the adorable outfits he received.

It was a magical day. All of the gifts are greatly appreciated, but the best present was the intangible feeling that has stayed with me after all of my good friends went home. Throughout all of the challenges of my pregnancy, I often felt like I had to rely on my own strength to get through the day. Last semester when I was really sick, I would bribe myself with mac and cheese from Noodles to get myself to class. This semester I have begun playing fast paced techno music on my ipod to help me walk to my classes.

But relying on my own will was just an illusion. The whole time I have been surrounded by incredible women, just waiting for me to ask for help. Often times I didn't even need to ask. I would never have made it this far without the help of my family and friends. My Baby Shower was just a final reminder that I am not entering motherhood alone. I am so lucky to have so many supportive people in my life: to cheer me on when life is awesome, to encourage me when life gets hard. I feel so much love around me.

Last night I was having a ton of Braxton Hicks contractions. Today I am 37 weeks, considered full term. I told Owen that he can come when he's ready. We have the nursery ready and the clothes, the moby, the genie and everything else imaginable. I am overflowing with love and support. All we need is our little bumpkin. And a little patience. . .